A Third Party Divides A Healthy Relationship/Marriage

I invited my friends on facebook to comment/write their views on the matter; “What cause marriage conflicts/breakups of relationships in general?”

In 1 sentence or 2 this is what they had to say:

Neo Vinolia Ramatong,“Infidelity for one.”

Ipeleng Smith Stephens Mayer, “Lies,lack of trust caused by lies,breakdown in communication caused by lies i mean who wants 2 tok 2 sum1 if u knw they r goin 2 lie.....c whr m goin wit dis?”

Ipeleng Modisane, “’No communication ppl alwys tend 2suspect eachada n end up wit their own conclusions,leadn 2arguments etc”

Milagrosa Mondlane, “Sum dnt want 2 accept wht they hav,they dnt gt satisfied.”

Precious Madonsela, “lack of honesty & commitment.”

Monica Ncongwane, “Lies and emotional abuse”

Mpho Mothobi, “I agree wt Neo infidelity, da main reazn.”

Fanboy Khusi, “Amanga nokungethembani Mfundisi.”

Precious Busisiwe Mahlangu, “Lack of communication, misunderstandings, having high expectations, dishonesty, any third party in ur relationship & asumptions.”

Rebecca Mologadi-Nono Khambane, “Mostly infidelity,but also lack of respect for each other and each other's feelings. Marriage is a partnership n no one is superior to the other.”

Sammy Mondlane-Pitso, “Relationship with no respect will never survive.”

Ipeleng Mompati, “Definitely lack of communication n dishonesty. If ppl learned to open up so dat ur partner wil knw wat u thinkin n feelin things wuld b much simplier”

Precious Mudau, “I agree wt presh thrd party cn also cause rlati0nshp n mariage nt last....lack of comunicati0n n trust also plays a role”

Emmanuel Sinthumule, “Speaking your partner's love language is a key to love that last, opposite leads to D (Dr. Chapman's five love language)”

Ipeleng Sekano, “Infidelity, bad company n being fickle, if friends control who u r there is no way u'll sustain a good relationship. Being with someone 4 all the wrong reasons also makes couples 2 separate.”
Precious Ndlovu, “Dishonesty,cheatin an nt respectin 1 anotha.”

Lebohang Modisakeng,"Lack of communication, lack of trust. not willing 2 compromise 4 anything in de marriage/relationship. taking each other 4 granted and not making time 4 each other.”

“oh yes respect 4 each other also plays a major role in a relationship”


“Yes sago fele sa hlola but in marriage only death shall part de 2.”


“Thanks 4 de topic. we need 2 be reminded once in a while wat love, relationships n marriage is all about...”
Karabo Rabothata, “we wl talk n talk,de truth is;sa go se fele,se ya tlhola.we hv 2 accept gore ke nature.finish n klaar.”
Khombi Masine, “lv is lyk a WAR, IS EAZY 2 START BT DIFFICULT 2 END. Pride!!!”

“And we 4gt dt once u replace sm1 u wll alwyz hv a repetation of replycment!”

Lerato Mazibuko, “Lack of tolerance and high expectations.”

Nomsa Mahlangu, “It al happens becos many people get in2marriage for wrong reasons nt becos they r in luv bt becos of material thngs thn after getting married they realize tht they r nt inlov wth the person bt with wht they've got then they end up being unfaithful&that ends in devorce thats wht i thnk.”

Ipeleng Moea "Could it b dat partners tend to loose each other sumwher along d road.ja agree communication bt u can't 4 ever repeat urself.I tink sumtims fail 2 c d truth,as u grow ur needs changes n it cld b ur partner is wat u need in ur life or not"

Lets look the scripture in the book of Genesis when God created man (Adam). From the beginning of the creation, God and Adam were very very close. They did everything together. The talked mouth to mouth. They were always walking together in the garden of Eden, and there were no secretes between them. Adam was God’s right hand man who was entrusted and given full responsibilities to take care of God’s precious property (Garden of Eden).

We note that; God and Adam communicated frequently to keep their relationship strong, and to ensure that God’s instructins were carried properly.

COMMUNICATION plays a very important role in keeping a healthy relationship between 2 people. We note that God and Adam were always together.

STAY CLOSE TO ONE ANOTHER: I don’t believe in long distance relationships. Sorry! That gap beween you can be a problem in your relationship. We note that God trusted Adam.

TRUST is one important component in a healthy relatisonship. Do not lie to one another; do good for your partner even if he/she is not in your sight; stop assumptions; stop making sole decisions. Just be trusted; no secretes!

What caused devision between God and Adam? The third party. In this case the third party was Eve. Adam spent much time with Eve than God; Adam trusted Eve than God. After that we see Adam going against the ruling of God. Eve became a third party in God/Man relationship, and that created division between the 2. When a relationship is broken no one cares between. We see God punishing his best friend, because He felt betrayed.

What was supposed to be a blessing became a curse!

A snake in the same story became a third party between Adam and Eve; and between God and men (people).

The moment Even spent time with the snake, she then spent less time with the husband. She had to start buying to the lies of the snake; trusting the snake because she communicated much with it. She trusted in the snake that she ended up doing whatever the snake said she must do which was gainst the principle of Adam and God.

The most important components in a healthy relationship are;

• Communication

• Trust

• Staying Closer to One Another

Don’t ever allow a third substance in your relationship. A third party maybe relatives, friends, boy and girlfriends (external relationships), children of your own, lack of money, having lots of money, lack of materials such as cars, a house etc. Do not allow this to divide you!!!